Brought to you by the two massively confused Dutch fans we saw in the Geneva Fanzone here is...
10 Things I Learnt From My Holiday in Switzerland
1. The Swiss do not like jokes about themselves. Spend some time with them and you will get to know their sense of humour but THEY DO NOT LIKE JOKES ABOUT THEMSELVES!
2. Everyone in Switzerland is rich. Even the men on their road signs wear top hats.
3. There is a french channel called Animaux that exclusively shows Animal programming. It's great, nothing but animals. There is also a softcore porn channel but sadly it is not called Porn.
4. If Grant Staples was a character from Sex and the City he would be Miranda. He also hearts shoes.
5. All swiss public transport runs exactly on time. Never early, never late. As it should be.
6. Swiss children cannot cope with a long ball strategy when playing against English men (and Paul) who are nearly twice their age and twice their size. THEY GOT SERVED.
7. I can read French much better than I can speak it.
8. Photoshopped pictures of cats in pots are pretty darn LOL.
9. Pretending you don't speak someone's language is a confusingly efficient tactic in trying to cross the border and enter their country.
10. All dogs should be forced to wear kneckerchiefs. It makes them look like hairy mechanics. This can only be a good thing.
Peace
Steve
